I celebrated my 40th birthday last week and while I thought about doing one of those lists of everything I wish I knew in my 30’s, I think that’s what your 30’s are for - learning through your own personal experiences and growing through them. Instead, I want to share some life choices I made over the last 10 years that I am now seeing the results of because I think that might be more helpful and encouraging if you are in your 20’s-30’s and freaking out about life a little.
Cleaning up my diet and avoiding alcohol
I completely overhauled my diet in my 30’s. Your daily eating habits will dictate how you look and feel by the time you are 40. I do not regret a single ounce of effort I put into changing my diet, learning how to cook, and being very disciplined. Your life and looks will always be determined by your habits. I created a digital food & grocery guide that makes it super easy to clean up your own - you can download it on my website (I put it on sale for my birthday week!).
Avoiding the COVID Vaccine
I almost left this one out because I don’t want to be controversial - but I do want to be honest. True to my holistic approach, I didn’t believe in the vaccine. I avoided it by choice, but guess what, I also avoided getting COVID – which is why a holistic lifestyle does pay off. When you take care of your body, it takes care of you, and that is the point I want to emphasize here. There is no shortcut to health and well-being. In our modern environment you have to try even harder. Investing in your health day in and day out has many payoffs - some you don’t always acknowledge because they’re simply preventative.
Avoiding Botox
So far, I’ve opted out of Botox and in my opinion, I think I’m holding up well. All thanks to a holistic lifestyle that includes a clean diet, minimal alcohol, low-impact workouts, practicing regular self-care, working on my emotional health, and doing the things that make me happy. I’ve always thought Botox ages people and I’m glad I haven’t indulged in a quick fix yet (and even when I have been tempted lately I remind myself of the toxins I would be injecting into my body). Focus on a healthy diet, avoid alcohol, use good skincare and you won’t need botox.
Getting Invisalign
This is one cosmetic fix I made that I’m happy about. I remember the moment when my boyfriend at the time asked me if I wanted Invisalign or a handbag for Christmas. Sexy, I know, and honestly not a fair question to ask me because I love getting a new handbag BUT my gut said, ‘pick the thing that will last’ and so I did. I’m so grateful I made the choice to get Invisalign because that gave me a confidence boost that has lasted longer than any handbag I would have picked. Material things can come and go, always make the investments in yourself that are going to payoff in the long-run.
Reading
I read so much in my 30’s - mostly books on healing, personal growth and manifestation. I was obsessed. I don’t regret being obsessed with learning the in’s and outs of creating my life exactly the way I want it to be. It also lead me to my passion. Be obsessed – you never know where it’s going to lead you.
Throwing myself a birthday party when I was turning 33
It was my first time initiating a party for myself, sending out invites, and choosing exactly how I wanted to celebrate. It was an intimate dinner with about 8 people and such a fun, memorable night. Those memories will last a lifetime and not to get too deep but it was a critical age where I was working on loving myself more and more, so celebrating myself like that was a big deal for shifting my energy that I probably didn’t even realize at the time.
Ending an engagement on my 35th birthday and moving in with my parents
Talk about humbling experiences. Honestly it feels weird to even call it an engagement because it feels like a lifetime ago. I can thank all the healing work I did that helped me let go of all the emotions that came with it. But seriously, if you’re in your late 20’s or early 30’s and you’re stressed because you’re not married let me at least share this wisdom – you are always going to be the most important love of your life. That doesn’t mean the choices you make out of self-love will be easy or comfortable. Keep working on yourself for you. I spent my entire 30’s becoming more of who I want to be and creating my life how I want it to be – finding my passions, healing my heart, and getting more and more comfortable with myself so that when the right person does come in, my life feels full with or without them. I’m wise enough to know now that every relationship in my life is a reflection of my relationship with myself.
When you are making life decisions, start asking yourself questions like:
“What do I actually want right now?”
“How does this make me feel?
“Is this something I really want or is it for some sort of validation?”
“Am I choosing this because it feels right or because I am afraid?”
Fear can come in many forms - fear we will never get what we want, fear that we don’t deserve more, fear that we don’t have other options, fear we won’t be accepted etc.
When you start asking yourself questions like this you start to learn more about your own beliefs. Then you can start to challenge them. Tune into your gut feelings. Take time to sit with yourself and tune into your inner voice. Honor what it has to say. Your dream life will take time, patience, healing, and a lot of letting go of 'what’s normal’ or ‘good enough’ for something extraordinary. There are things I am still being patient with. If you are in your 20’s or 30’s, your life is just beginning - stay curious, embrace discomfort, focus on growing, and stay open to new possibilities.